‘Myself’ is a loaded pronoun, it is a pronoun which is grammatically suggestive of a self reflected back on itself through actions or thoughts. It represents my person as I sit here writing this, my past which has brought me here where I sit and write, and the potential of what may happen next. It is a multiplicity of selves, changed and influenced by time, experience and encounters all woven together in the weave of a fabric called ‘me’. Yet there are two sides to a piece of fabric, just as there are two sides to me: my interior self and my exterior self.
These two selves are inextricably bound but often run a different course and carry different attitudes. The me that engages is not necessarily the me which retreats, but we are one and the same person. Deleuze would call this an ‘entre-deux’, a fold not in two, but a fold of two, ‘…differentiation does not refer to a pre-given undifferentiated, but to a Difference that endlessly unfolds over from each of its two sides.’
I call it the parallel self.
Immediately, the thought arises of split personality or other dimensions, but that isn’t it. The parallel self is the self not visible but which has influence on the self projected in the moment. It is the self which carries all the past and the self which anticipates the coming moment. It is me, ‘the-who-I-am’ which propels me forward. It is me and all the folds in the multiplicity of consciousness. Deleuze also says, ‘I am forever unfolding between two folds and if to perceive means to unfold, then I am forever perceiving within the folds.’ This suggests perpetual perception, but a perception which is hindered or baffled by what lies beyond awareness; a perception limited by obstruction.
This obstruction has many forms; it is the context of our perception and as such influences the way we interact with the world. These forms include socialization, memory, experience, resources and circumstance. But where are we in all this? Where is ‘the-who-I-am’, the self which perceives? There can be no separating me from my fold, but is there a discernable boundary of difference and can I affect that boundary? Can I impact my own context or am I forever bound to the vagaries of the fold.
This exhibition looks at some of these questions through memory, limitation and socialization.